Leaving High School Behind...You're in College

Here I am finally sitting down to write again. It is January 11 and I do not understand how this time has gone by so fast. I feel like I was just sitting in my room thanking the Lord for Christmas break. Some know what happened during my break and others don't. I seem to face the imaginable when ever I start to change or I change my location. I'm trying my best now to react calmly about the situations at hand and try to handle them with God. Lately I have been finding a new me. Coming here, Calvin, has changed me. I am not the same at all. My art that I create has changed....some weird mature twist is added onto it. I come to calvin and I sit on the "weird" side of the dining hall because I am sick of being judged by people my age. I am now used to having friends that are older than me because we relate better. Now the so called freshman seem to irritate me. They were once perfect in High school and now they come here and party their brains out. I sit in my classes and actually enjoy the books they give us to read but I hear the freshman complain about it. Readers, I know I am a freshman too...don't get me wrong. I am tired of girl fights and boys who take complete advantage of my friends. I'm tired of walking on egg shells around people I do not click very well with. I'm sick of people not being open minded to the other's culture. I'm tired of shit-faced kids not taking advantage of the school they are attending. To be honest sometimes I feel like my friends think I am that immature person. I am just like the rest. I hate that. I hate the all the pretty faces, the ones who say that this year they will not drink any soda for their new years resolution. Why can't it be about prayer, or being nicer, or opening up, or supporting a starving kid for once, or giving your all. This blog is most likely an angry one but I'm tired of this world. We say we are all christians at this school called Calvin but when I sit on the "cool" side of the dining hall I feel everyone's eyes on me and my friends. I feel judged. When I sit on the "weird" side I see people who don't care. Some I can tell are christians and others have just lived life....they were their plaid and band T-shirts without a care of what the pretty people think. I'm not a pretty person. I do not spend hours on my hair. Making sure that I apply my "face" each morning. I do not pretend to be nice. I do not act like I am better than you. I have my bad habits I have my pit falls. But you're in college now, it's time to grow up. High School is called High School and college is called college for a reason. I'm done playing games.