I love Him

I have been away from home for 3 months next week. I can't believe my ears when I think about it or even say it out loud. Some know the first reason why I chose Calvin and others don't. The reason was at the time of getting accepted I was in a funk, a pit. School was horrible. Friends at school were distant towards me since I shut down after my Mom's death. Life at home wasn't any better. I wanted to get away to get out of Escondido and live. To breath fresh air. So I made the choice to go. By the end of senior year I finally reached normal. I finally found those friends who stood by me even if I shut them out. I felt the air in my lungs, my lungs expanded to their fullest. My face had I smile. Of course I still hit some road blocks but my faith was strong and I felt invisible. At that moment I didn't want to leave. I found life and I was then going to leave life. I found contentment. I found my strength. God was seeking me and still is but I was seeking Him.

I left for college. I had no idea what to expect. First few weeks were crazy with homework and new faces. Everyone was a new face. Has I started to make friends and make my life here I think I forgot to something with me. Something beyond important. I forgot to pack God in my equation. What was...what am I thinking? God is my hope for tomorrow. He is the glue in my heart and mind. He is the one who brings me peace and joy when I am in sorrow. He is always there no matter where I put him. Now just putting that into action instead of thought is were I am at.

This is something new for me because I have no lost my faith or haven't lost God. I lost myself. Now it is time to get to know God even deeper for me to begin to know myself again. I'm weary but I have faith and I trust in God that I will be filled with joy.

I love Him